“You have a whole lot of love in you,” Agnes said to me.
It was probably one of, if not the most, beautiful thing anyone has said to me. And as I heard the traces of pity in her words, I realized that it, too, was the saddest anyone has spoken of me- that I could never learn to unlearn the reckless way in which I give myself to someone.
- Carissa: How do you know if you're falling for someone?
- Victoria: When you start asking these questions.
November 08, 2008
I want to write you 365 love letters. One for each day of the year. I’d tell you how my day went. How boring or exciting it was! I could tell you about my bus rides- the people, the smell, the scenery from the window, and the thoughts that ran through my mind. On some days, I could retell memories of you and me. I’d recall our movie dates and food trips. But mostly, I’d end up saying how much I love the time we spend stuck in traffic. How our most meaningful and useless conversations happen inside your car. When everything’s fine I stare into your eyes. When we fight, my eyes are checking out how much gas you have left. On some of the letters, I’d tell you how much I’m sorry for the things that tick you off. And worse, the things that hurt you. I’d tell you how sorry I am for being late. I’d be sorry for messing up your hair. But not really cos you look cute when your hair’s rumpled. Maybe I could also write about your hugs and how safe they make me feel. And your kisses. I’ll write you letters on days that I don’t see you and on days, too, that I spend with you. I’d write you letters. I’d write you alot. Just to remind you that everyday I love you a little more than how I did from the last love letter I gave you.